Spiders can be big sometimes.

So I've been talking about Martha's Vineyard and St. Martin a lot lately, so I'll probably just continue. You BETTER be okay with it.

This story comes from St. Martin. We stayed in a huge place that was our parents friends friends house. It was like a mansion. Anywho, like I stated in previous entries, we went with our family friends. Upstairs, there were two rooms right next to each other, one of which my sister Sally stayed in by herself, and the other Lucy and I stayed in. One night, after we all watched a movie and decided to go to bed, Lucy and I discover something on the ceiling outside of our room. But what was it? It was neon orange and it looked like it had tentacles. It was a SPIDER!

Now, there is probably nothing that I hate in this world more than spiders. If one is even NEAR me, I will flip my shit. If one is ON me, I scream and flap around like I'm trying to fly away. I would say even sometimes I get teary eyed, but let's not get too carried away.

So we see this spider (?) on the ceiling and then it starts to MOVE, which was very creepy. It started walking towards Sally's room, and Lucy and I were like, "It's on its way to Sally's room! It's going to EAT her!!!" So we end up going downstairs to get our friend to come and see it, which he does and we tell him to FREAKIN KILL IT which he does. In all honesty, bright orange spiders with goddamned SUCTION CUPS as hands DO exist. This spider was so freakin big that I could actually see that it was wearing NIKEs on its feet. I could see his face and his stupid smile like he was saying "I'M up HERE, and YOU'RE down THERE! Bruahahaha!" But you're dead now, Mr. Neon Orange Spider, and you were thrown in a bathroom TRASH CAN. So who's the bitch now?

On a complete random note, I was clipping my fingernails today and I was doing it kind of close to my face, (never a good idea) and one of the clippings went up my nose. I laughed.

On another complete random note, when I was driving today, I saw ONE bowling shoe on the side of the road. This means that someone ACTUALLY stole bowling shoes, and then got so mad as they were driving that they were like "SCREW THIS SHOE!" and threw it out their window. What problem could they possibly have with their stolen bowling shoe?! "I stole this cause I thought they'd look cool (wrong) but they're just too damn SLIPPERY. I'm slipping all over the place! These aren't even the ones with the velcro straps! I actually have to TIE these suns a bitches!" I figured this person is one of those people who walk around with overalls on with no shirts underneath and always carries a piece of straw in his mouth. Probably missing one or five teeth.

But anywhores.

St. Patty's Day tomorrow! Green beer!


This is me signing off...

Haha.

-Jenny