Speaking of movies, I cannot wait for Black Swan to come out on DVD. I know that it will be a while, seeing as how it just left theaters, but I can't wait to actually own it. Even though this was easily the weirdest movie I've ever seen in my twenty two years of living, I feel like that just makes me like it more. Yeah, Natalie Portman masturbates a couple times (which is wayyyyyy awkward to watch), and yeah, there's a handful of lesbian scenes (which is wayyyyy awkward to watch). Natalie Portman's character is just so sad to watch, because she is so goddamn weird. She lets everyone do just about anything they want to her, and she hardly ever protests. She lets her mother run her life because she is a controlling maniac. She lets her director put his hands all over her because well, he is just a horndog apparently. AND... she let's people drug her.
I feel like somebody should tell poor Natalie Portman that when you actually SEE somebody put something in your drink, um...don't drink it? People all over the place are getting shit put in their drinks, but here Natalie is, actually seeing somebody put something in her drink, and she's like "heyyyyy that looks good! I wonder why it's all fizzy though? OH maybe it's a wine spritzer!" No...no it's not, Natalie. If you wanted the drugs, just take them yourself.
I love it when people pretend like things aren't their fault. Such as when my father backed up into my car in the driveway. Let me break this down: my father's car=big jeep wrangler. my car=little volvo station wagon.
So he leaves for work early in the morning and walks out to the garage. To walk to the garage, he has to pass my car, which is just sitting there, harming no one, minding it's own business. Then, he gets in his jeep and throws it in reverse, not even thinking to actually look in any mirror. Smashes into my poor car, leaves a huge dent.
Now, I get that shit like this happens. However, I have a huge problem when somebody sees that my car is there, and then doesn't bother to look in any of the three mirrors that allow you to actually see behind you. And judging by the size of the dent, he was definitely going seventy miles an hour. That's just an estimation though.
Okay, okay. So you make a mistake, that's fine. But the fact that he blamed ME for parking there is just preposterous. You having NO damage on your precious jeep and me having my back door completely smashed in is completely preposterous. You know what dad? The fact that you have no idea what a goddamn review mirror is, is simply not my problem. MAYBE he was in a rush to kill another cat.
This is not the best part of the story. That comes next.
Yes, my father decides to try one of those "fix it yourself" thingy majigs that allow you to pull out dents. What my dad DOESN'T understand is that these things are for small dents. Which this was not. This dent is the size of my freaking door. That's big, by the way. A door is big.
I just can't explain the things that my family does. Like every Sunday my sister Sally comes home and it looks like she has never heard of a hairbrush. Or the fact that my other sister, Lucy, actually shines her boyfriend's shoes as he watches. Or the fact that my mother watches the "Jersey Shore" every single time it's on...but doesn't shutup about how stupid it is. Or like how my boyfriend Linus won't watch Paranormal Activity with me because he thinks his house is haunted. I tried to tell him that the movie wasn't about GHOSTS, it was about DEMONS. Which, to no surprise, did not make him feel better or change his mind.
I'm sorry, I just don't see the horror in a door closing by itself. I mean, if it happened to me, I would shit my pants. No lie. And after that, I'd probably die of a panic attack. But watching it in a movie...not so bad. Would I ever watch Paranormal Activity by myself? No. Would I ever watch it at night? No. I just can't do scary movies at night. With the exception of watching Pet Cemetery at three in the morning with my best friend Schroeder. But there was beer involved beforehand, (like always), so clearly, it wasn't thought through. But that movie wasn't even SCARY. But I have seen both Paranormal Activity movies and I was not extremely phased by them.
The scariest movie to this day to me will always be Fern Gully.
Seriously. Hate that movie.
Seriously. This one scared the shit out of me too.
The funny thing is, I watched these movies as a child. And of course, they were creepy as hell. But if I watched them now as somewhat of an adult, I would probably still be frightened. Maybe even more than I was as a child. The movies they make for children are just so scary. The Little Mermaid...Ursula anyone? The Lion King...the hyenas? 101 Dalmations...Cruella?! Honestly! Disney movies are scary!!! And they are also made by drug addicts. Honestly, are you really making a movie about a TOASTER and other household appliances going on a journey? A talking TOASTER that can walk and talk. My toaster just burns BAGELS! Dear Lord! Who approves your ideas?! Come on vacuum, come on heated blanket, come on lamp, let's go on an adventure!
ANYWAY.
I'm glad we are actually going out to breakfast as a family tomorrow morning. Because honestly, people in this crazy house think it's okay to eat cupcakes and leftover pizza for breakfast. And it's not even like a "I woke up late, it's eleven o' clock" breakfast. It's like a real breakfast time, ranging from hours 8-10. People in this house do not know that this is not normal. I just hope they don't ask the waitress for cold pizza when we go to breakfast. I will bring a hat and sunglasses just in case they do.
Song of the day: "Close to Me" by The Get Up Kids. It's a remake of the Cure song, but it is a very interesting version.
-Jenny
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