But who cares? I only jumped in front of Linus' golf ball and/or threw my golf club in the path of his putts. One time the ball was actually headed STRAIGHT for the hole, to which he got kinda somewhat mad. But it was a perfectly executed plan.
And I have this thing with mini golf, that if my ball ends up in a place that is, for lack of better description, in a shitty location, I just move it wherever I want. But you have to be careful with who you play with while doing this, because surprisingly, some people won't let you get away with it. But on the other hand, if you take mini golf SERIOUSLY, I do not want to hang out with you.
But in the midst of my constant cheating, I was reminded of how I cheated in another game. And it of course, had to be "Guess Who?" Yeah you know, the game for six year olds.
So I was playing with Linus and we were outside. And the sun was in perfect placement shining behind him. So perfect, that it was in fact, shining on his card, making it very clear to me what character he had.
I don't know what's more sad/pathetic. The fact that once I noticed this, I acted like I had just seen something I surely wasn't supposed to see. I acted like I just saw somebody's nip slip out of their dress. Like you see it, and then you immediately dart your eyes someplace else. I instantly said to myself "oh my god! I can see right through his card! Well, don't LOOK Jen, geesh. Play fair." Or the fact that I actually looked for quite some time, and in the end, I guessed it and won.
But it COULD be worse. You could be Sally and cheat at every single game you've ever played. Sally cheats at Clue (she calls it STRATEGY), she cheats at Spongebob Life (played with my 6 year old cousin at the time), or her favorite thing to cheat at, UNO.
She likes to switch it up in her UNO cheating ways. Most of the time, it's a minor offense, such as putting sixes on top of nines and nines on top of sixes. We recently caught onto this, so everytime she puts one down, everyone at the table leans in like magnets to make sure it's right. Most of the time, it is, but I'm pretty sure she waits until everybody's had more drinks to start doing it. That's just my opinion.
But there was a major offense during a Martha's Vineyard UNO game one night. On top of all her nine and six offenses (which we caught her every time, but she continued to do it), we found that she was hiding cards under her chair cushion. How did we find out, you ask? Well I will tell you.
Even SHE forgot about them because she got up to go to the bathroom and this pile of cards just fell to the ground. I mean, if you're going to cheat in a big way like that, you've got to be careful. You can't just let your hidden cards fall on the floor. The funniest part though, was the fact that she was NOT winning. Not even close. But I will say I'm a little disappointed in all of us for not noticing. "Oh, Sally has UNO again?! She just had half the card deck, where did it all go!? And what's that poking out from under her seat cushion? Oh well, just luck I guess."
Anyways. Sally and I played the Sims with my younger cousin the other day. One thing to keep in mind, Sally is a nazi when it comes to the Sims. Now, my cousin is only nine years old. But did that stop Sally from yelling at her the entire duration of the game? No. "OH MY GOD! She has to go to the bathroom! WHY DON'T YOU TAKE HER TO THE BATHROOM?!" (she was saying this while the sim was on her way to the stupid bathroom.) Somebody needs to give her a chill pill asap.
But it was somewhat humorous to watch my cousin play. Because, she made two sims, and she would often neglect one of them while she played the other one. We learned that when you don't put your sim in the shower, there WILL be a big brown stench cloud that comes off of them. And when they are laying on the couch with this stink cloud, you WILL think they are possibly dead.
Speaking of, when we used to play the Sims on the computer, I would make these cool characters and build them this cool house. Then, they would obviously have no cooking skills, so I would have them use the stove. Then I'd have them ignore the beeping for dinner to be ready, which would set the kitchen on fire.
Then here's what I would do.
I would put them in the kitchen and leave them there, as the entire kitchen engulfed in flames. Sometimes, I would get mad when the firefighters would bust in and save me. But then when that was the case, I'd just do it again.
Some people kill their sims by complete accident or neglect. I do it for laughs.
It's ALMOST as disturbing as what I used to do in Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, but we will NOT go there.
One of my cousins sims couldn't make it to the bathroom in time, and she peed right in the middle of the street. I was instantly reminded of JWoww from Jersey Shore.
Then I thought to myself, I should make a Jersey Shore Sim game. HAH. Doing it.
-Jenny
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