Camping. Friend...or Foe?

So it's been a while. I know. And to my 3 readers, I truly apologize. Anyway, the summer is basically over and it has been a wild ride. You know, like always. 

I guess I'll start with my birthday. Because something epic happened. Yes...I played flip cup with my mother. It all started with my cousin's graduation party. You know the deal, family during the day, all the rowdy college graduates at night. So you're eating lunch with your grandma at one point, discussing current events, and the next thing you know BOOM! you're downing a beer and your mother is right next to you in a line of ten 20 something year olds. Your mom can't seem to get the cup to stand upright, and everyone is yelling at her, so she just blatantly takes it and sets it right. Everybody ignores this because she's old and they were tired of waiting. 

Plus, we weren't going to win anyway. 

Later that week, I went camping with Sally, Schroeder, and Franklin. You know, the group. (Sidebar: I think it's funny that my group of closest friends are either related to me/have grown up with me/meow when they are hungry.) Now, I'm not going to say that we were somewhat tipsysilly basically the entire time, but I'm also not going to say that we weren't. 

So we got there having high hopes of being around a bunch of kids our age. Maybe we could make friends! we thought. Wrong. After parking at our site, and after we hit a tree while doing so, we looked around at our neighbors to find that on one side was an entire family and the other side was a bunch of Asians. Nothing was wrong with either one, but it was true. These weren't people that we could stay up late and drink with. So we paid them no attention as if we were models and they were fat kids. 

The first night we "got after it" as Schroeder would often say. We made a fire, then we cooked steak on the grill. We ate the steak by candlelight because it was 9:30 pm and then we played UNO (our second favorite game to play when we're drunk). So after almost everyone is cheating and nobody is actually noticing said cheating, we are now whispering because it was officially "Quiet hours". Or at least I think we were whispering. I hope we were whispering. We had to have been whispering because nobody was yelling at us. YET. 

So blah blah blah, a huge June Bug flies into the citronella candle, Franklin picks it out and throws it in his mouth like it was a candy bar blah blah blah then he realized it tasted like citronella and spits it back out blah blah blah. "I would have swallowed it if it didn't taste like poison" blah blah. 

To tell this next part, I need to describe the backstory. My parents are an odd couple. They seem to think that wherever they are in the house and/or outside, if they just yell the other one's name, then they'll  hear it. So when my Dad wants my mom, he'll yell what sounds like "ENNNN". This isn't funny unless you know my mom's name. Let's get real and say it because the three of you readers know her already. Her name is Sharron and my dad yells "ENNNN!" in his best Kermit the Frog voice. My mom does the same thing. She will yell what sounds like "BWAHB?!" (Everybody knows dad too, his name is Bob). The funny thing about my mom yelling this is that she ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS sounds so PANICKED. Like she just saw him fall off a cliff. "BWAHB!?" 

So as the first night camping wears on, we finally find our way to the tent to go to sleep. (Yes, the four of us shared a tent, it's not weird.) The next part I do not remember doing, so I'm just going off of what everybody told me. We were talking very quietly in the tent because we are in the middle of two families and it's around midnight. Having a lovely conversation about Sally and Franklin's wedding. This is apparently about the time I thought it would be a good idea and shout out a big "BWAHHHB?!?!?!" which caused everybody to erupt in laughter. (I don't mean everybody around us, just the people in our tent). This is when we heard a "BE QUIET, PLEASE." and everything got real quiet and we went to bed. 

The next morning, Schroeder apologized to the family next to us, because we were sure it was them who didn't think our outbursts were all that funny. The woman apparently said she didn't think we were loud at all, and that we were actually good neighbors. Although she was nice, she had obviously taken a heavy amount of Tylenol PM. So if it wasn't her, then who was it? It wasn't the Asian family...but it was the couple across from us that looked like a young man with his mother. It's like, "Oh, excuse us for interrupting your slumber with your MOM! Yeah, we're four grown adults sleeping in the same tent WHAT OF IT?! Why don't you cut the cord, MOM." We didn't bother with them. They left shortly after. Because of us? We will never know.

The rest of the trip was amazingly awesome, except for the little boy next to us (who frighteningly looked like the boy from "The Grudge") waking me up both mornings riding around on his scooter RIGHT outside our tent screaming "You can't catch me! You can't catch me!" in which I made a half asleep promise to in fact "catch him, and then throw him in the lake". Oh and Sally wore a head lamp on our walks to the bathroom at night. And she kept it on, while she peed. Not just on her head, but she kept the light on. When someone else came into the bathroom, I pretended like I didn’t know her.

In other news, my mom found all my report cards basically from pre school to high school. I thought my pre school one was particularly funny. Once again, this will show Schroeder's real name. But whatever, I'll let it go just this once:

-Jenny