ZZ Top songs and imaginary baseball gloves.

So, this weekend was interesting. To say the least.

It's funny, the things you learn about people that you never knew. Like when your parents have a few friends over. And disturbing news arises.

Now, I know that when we go to the Vineyard every year, my parents tell our neighbors that they can come and use our pool any time. And I knew that our neighbors did this. No big deal. What I DIDN'T know was that they skinny dip in our pool. Now, upon hearing this, I went into shock. And by shock, I mean I started yelling a lot, and MAYBE suffered from a rage blackout. Because honestly, not only is that COMPLETELY wrong, but I came home and swam in that pool! I GOT THE WATER IN MY MOUTH! I OPEN MY EYES UNDER WATER! And you tell ME that naked people have been in my pool and NOT expect me to flip my lid!?

So anywho. Speaking of naked people, we put on a variety of CDs and the Armageddon soundtrack was one of them. This CD is full of Aerosmith and other old bands. There was a ZZ Top song, and Schroeder fell in love with it. Before the weekend was over, he bought the ringtone. Now, I don't have a problem with ZZ Top, but there's just something about the beards. It just doesn't sit right with me. Just saying. It's a fire hazard.

We went out last night to a bar, and after having many beers (who am I kidding, we were drinking all day), we were on our way home and while we were blasting Phil Collins "You'll Be In My Heart" on the back roads of Middleboro, Schroeder jacks on the brakes and says "WAS THAT A BASEBALL MITT?!" and for some reason, I thought he said "baseball bat." (Yes, I am aware that these two words do not at all sound like one another.) To which I am somewhat nervous, because when someone gets THAT excited over a baseball bat, then A) they are going to beat you senseless with it, or B) they are going to want to play baseball, and Schroeder is awful at baseball, or C) they are going to beat someone ELSE with the baseball bat, in which I wouldn't want to bail him out of jail afterwards. Then he proceeds to throw the car in reverse and back up what seemed like HALF A MILE. Upon investigating, I started cracking up because not only was it NOT a baseball mitt, but it was a piece of shiny paper on the road. We proceeded to drive home and while I was almost peeing myself laughing, all Schroeder could say was, "Damn, I thought I found myself a free baseball mitt."

But in all  honesty, would you want to stick your hand in a place you have no idea where its been?

So when we got home, we watched a movie on Lifetime. Heh. When you watch a movie on Lifetime it only means one thing. There is absolutely NOTHING else on.

The movie was "Obsessed", and it had Beyonce in it. Now, I really don't like Beyonce. I mean, I think she's a nice enough person, but as an actress, (and as a singer) I think she's awful. In this movie, her husband is being seduced by a hot blonde who just wants to get him in the sack. So I understand this dilemma, but Beyonce does not smile ONCE in this movie. It's like, yeah I know that your husband MAY OR MAY NOT BE having an affair, but it's not like your grandmother got run over by a reindeer. I mean come on. There are worse things in the world that could happen then a sex crazed blonde hussie that's after your husband's weiner. Just sayin.

I don't want to spoil the ending in case anyone wants to actually see this movie, but let's just say that Beyonce "Don't want no scrub."


-Jenny